Rent Boy - Chapter 9

September 12, 2007 · Filed Under Rent Boy

Table of contents for Ren Boy

Chapter 9

Life is a candle before the wind.

Japanese Proverb

Josh sat in the deep rich leather of the chair, looking at the clock, waiting for the time to finally reach quarter past midnight. That was when he could expect Billy to get home from his job. He hated the waiting, especially on Saturday nights. He frowned as he tried to will the time to move faster and almost jumped as the huge hand on the clock

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crept past the 11 and signalled that it was still a whole hour and a bit before Billy would be home.

Gordon watched Josh over the edge of his book, his face cracked in a wide smile as he saw the way Josh kept glancing at the clock. He, too, would sneak a peak every now and then as he loved watching it when Billy came home from work.

These last two months had been very special for him. He had learned that love wasn’t just a good hard roll in the sack, but was something that never seemed to end, never seemed to tire, and definitely was always full of surprises. Gordon still laughed silently to himself as he watched the way Billy had changed. How he had grown so quickly into being someone entirely different. There was a deep sense of humour that had been locked into that boy, and now it was making up for all those years of captivity.

It still amazed him at how every Saturday morning he would find Billy in the kitchen, cooking breakfast. It wasn’t just for himself, he was cooking a banquet every morning for him and for Josh, plus he always made sure that he had enough for Gordon. What surprised him the most was that Billy insisted on serving it, even startling poor Manuel in that he insisted that Manual joined them for breakfast.

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That first Saturday had been so funny as Billy just stood toe to toe with poor Manuel, telling him to stop fussing and sit down. The poor man almost had a heart attack, sitting with his employer and worse, not even being allowed to help in preparing the food or even in doing the dishes afterwards.

Gordon had been stunned but didn’t argue. There was a new found confidence in his young charge and it made his chest swell out with pride. Secretly he felt he had a small part to play in it, even though he thought it had more to do with Josh. That first night, after his new edicts, had been a wild one.

Even off in his own room he could hear the two boys going at it. He thought they would break the bed the way they groaned and moaned and the way he heard the bed creaking under their gyrations. The next morning, Saturday, was when Billy started his now Saturday ritual of preparing breakfasts.

Gordon hadn’t felt comfortable in letting Billy take the job over at the corner market, specially when it meant working late Friday and Saturday nights, but Josh’s determined face and Billy’s equally firm voice made him give in rather quickly. At first he didn’t understand why Billy was so insistent on taking such a menial job, but he learnt two weeks later just what a good decision it had been.

Gordon leaned back in his chair, the book against his lap as he recalled that Saturday almost two months back. It was Billy’s first pay day from the store and, as usual, he and Josh had been sitting by the fireplace, attempting to read and relax, waiting for Billy to come home.

The clock had struck midnight, and both of them became fidgety as the hands slowly etched their way past quarter after, then twenty after, then half hour after and Josh was becoming a nervous wreck. Gordon spent the next twenty minutes trying to keep Josh from running outside to check the street. He also was feeling as nervous and had decided that when young Billy did arrive home, he would get the lecture of his young life. Funny how you could remember these things, later on, and how your memory of it was so vivid. He chuckled to himself as he recalled how he had felt and how relived he was when just before 1am Billy had walked in.

He had the biggest grin on his face and all thought of lecturing him seemed to have evaporated as he watched Josh leap out of the chair into Billy’s arms. It was almost too much for Gordon and he remembered how tears were welling up in the corner’s of his eyes as he saw the way Josh kissed every part of that grinning young face.

Gordon almost broke out laughing as he remembered how after a few minutes of hard kissing Josh had pushed Billy aside and started in on him. He was asking him where the hell he had been, how come he was so late, and why didn’t he phone and all the things a parent would

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say to a child or a wife to a wayward husband.

Billy just stood there, smiling and letting Josh run off at the mouth. He listened politely to the lecture on his tardiness, on how Josh had been a nervous wreck waiting for him and yet his smile didn’t diminish one iota. In fact, Gordon could see that it only grew wider and more pronounced. There was no doubt that Billy was tired, but also that he was up to something.

Josh finished his little tirade and cocked his head as he realized that all of his words were having no effect on his man. He had the cutest expression on his face, sort of pouting actually, his lips pursed together, his feet apart and his hands on his hips. Gordon smiled as he thought of how Josh looked like some angry wife, taken aback by the lack of response from the erring husband.

Billy laughed then too, which was about to get a rebuke from Josh when he just grabbed Josh and hugged him tight to his body. He lifted the tall young man up and twirled him around the room, his booming laughter filling the cavernous hallway with its pure joy. Even Gordon had been taken by surprise at this outburst and he too was wondering just what was going on.

Billy, still laughing, sat Josh down on the hallway chair, then he reached inside his nylon windbreaker and pulled out a small little box. All laughter stopped abruptly as Billy looked at the box in his hand, then he glanced up at Josh and slowly pushed it forward.

“Here… it isn’t much but it is… well… it’s the first thing I have bought, on my own, from… well… uh… its not much really Josh but it is the first time in a long time that I have been able to buy something that wasn’t earned from being on my back… so…”

Josh had tears in his eyes as Billy’s halting voice tried to explain it, and his hand was now wrapped over the small box and Billy’s shaking hand. He reached out and kissed Billy, ending the broken words, and there was a big grin on his face.

Gordon couldn’t help himself, he was in tears and while he used to hate emotional outbursts, he felt so damn good right then and there. Now it all made sense to him, why Billy had insisted on taking the job at the corner market, why he had insisted on being able to earn his own money. He wanted to feel the thrill that he was obviously getting right now. The tears rolled freely down Gordon’s cheeks as he watched Josh open the tiny box.

The light from the hallway glittered on the shiny silver trinket inside. Josh brought it out, a long thin silver chain with a small pendent attached hung from his hands as he looked into Billy’s eyes. He just smiled, his eyes locked onto Billy’s sparkling dark one’s. They said nothing, just looked deeply into each others eyes.

Gordon felt a pang of jealousy, wondering when or if he would

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ever find such love that these two obviously shared. He wiped his eyes as he watched Billy gently kiss the moistened eyes of Josh and then made Josh stand up and turn around so he could put the chain and heart shaped pendent around the long golden neck.

He could see the desire in Josh’s eyes as he lifted the heart shaped pendent up off his chest, and looked into Billy’s eyes. Gordon could tell that there was a deep bonding going on, something he thought that had already happened, but it struck him then: that each time they stared into the others eyes; they became even closer. It was a lesson in love that he was witnessing, not just then, but each day and every second that Billy and Josh were together or apart.

His heart was aching a little at the tender scene when Billy turned to him, Josh wrapped close under one very protective loving arm. For a second he thought that Billy was going to just say goodnight and take Josh up to bed, where no doubt they would engage in another of their unbelievably loud love making sessions. Instead, Billy started to stutter a bit, then he simply once more reached into his windbreaker and pulled out another box, this one slightly longer and narrow and handed it to Gordon.

“What’s this?” he had said and tears were now flowing freely down his cheeks. It was unheard of, someone giving him a gift without it being any occasion. He looked up into Billy’s eyes and was shocked. He saw tears there, but they weren’t tears of pain or disappointment but of happiness.

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“It isn’t much Gordon… but I needed to, well, uh, its just something small, I know its not up to your standards… but, well…”

“If it is from you it is well up to my standards Billy; but really, you shouldn’t have spent any of your hard earned money on me… really, I…”

“Gordon, yes I did have to… to say thanks… please… take it before we are all bawling like babies… ‘kay?”

Gordon reached out to take the narrow box, his hand trembling so much he was afraid he’d drop the tiny box. His heart was filled with such joy that he was only seconds away from outright crying and he knew that so was Billy and Josh. He could feel Josh’s pride as he took the box in his shaking hand.

For a brief second their hands touched. Gordon felt a strong jolt run through his body, and he looked up into the dark eyes of Billy and the deep blue of Josh’s. For the first time in many a decade, Gordon didn’t see blank stares, or greed, instead he felt a strange warmth covering him as he saw deep into their hearts and he could feel their love wrapping itself around his ancient old body.

Gordon couldn’t help himself, he cried and as the sobs came gurgling out of his mouth, he felt two strong sets of arms wrap themselves around his shaking frame. He felt wet tears against his own shoulders as they pressed their faces against his and rested on his knees. He could smell the two boys, their freshness, their youth; all of it just seemed to burst into his heart at once.

Tears flowed freely for the first time in many years as he hugged the two boys that had touched him so much. He finally realized why he had broken his own rules, and for the very first time Gordon felt that there was someone out there who cared, someone out there who would indeed shed tears were he to pass away. His heart leapt upwards, beating slightly faster as it tasted real love, and found it to be all that he thought it would be and more.

They had broken apart, Billy and Josh standing by his feet, looking down at him. Billy wiping away Josh’s tears and Josh returning the favour, yet both of them still keeping Gordon in their vision. He trembled as his hands fought to regain control and open the box that lay on his lap.

Slowly he managed to open it to find inside a silver rose, each pedal fully etched, and off of one perfect pedal, a tiny teardrop was attached. Gordon wiped his eyes as he stared at that rose, amazed that the feeling he had just experienced was not forever etched in that single silver rose and tear.

There had been no need for any more words. Gordon had risen up from his chair, and he stretched out his massive arms wide, and both Billy and Josh merely stepped into them. It was as close to heaven as he could feel, and his heart was sounding like a chorus of church bells, ringing in the New Year. He felt so complete, so at peace that he couldn’t speak even if he wanted to.

He looked them both in the eyes, feeling their love, feeling Josh’s pride in Billy, feeling Billy’s own pride at being able to do something on his own, without the need to surrender his body. It felt like they had reached heaven and were gliding around the skies on a silver lined cloud.

Gordon heard the clock chime midnight as he glanced up to the mantle, where he had placed a small silver rose with a tiny teardrop off one pedal. He wiped his eyes as he stared up at the now glass encased ornament, his most precious object d’art in his entire collection. A small blue light shone down on the case, and he remembered how Billy’s face had lit up when he had come in two days later to find his gift so prominently displayed.

There was no denying that the last few months had been almost idyllic for them. Josh had shown an interest in becoming a caterer and to that end Gordon had him learning the ropes. He was learning food costing, how to set a table to make the service easy and yet elegant. For his part, Billy had shown his culinary skills and next week would start

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formal training at a chef’s college in town.

They had such plans these two, it was amazing how they would sit and plan their future. Billy would be the culinary expert while Josh would manage it for him, getting him only the best of clients. Gordon figured into it too, they would insist that he would have the best parties on the continent, for ever and for free, and he would join in their planning, sometimes just adding a piece here or there, or just sitting back, revelling in their joy at simply planning a future.

He stared at the rose, marvelling at how his own life changed too. He no longer sat at home every day, instead he was going out more, meeting new people, finding that San Francisco had a great deal to offer. In fact, he even started to take a real interest in horticulture and was rapidly becoming an expert. Who would of thought that all his years of playing in his large gardens would give him such knowledge?

Josh and Billy had pushed him too, forcing him to join a garden club of old fags, and despite his misgivings he found himself enjoying the weekly meetings and get together’s. It was a whole new world for him, and as he gazed at the single rose, he knew it was due to the two young men who lived in his home.

“You really are proud of that rose aren’t you Gordon?” Josh asked softly.

Gordon slowly turned his face towards the soft voice. He smiled as he saw the grin on Josh’s face. He could also see the pride that was there; the way Josh just oozed it as he thought of Billy.

“Yes Josh, it is really something very special to me, sort of like that necklace you have in clutched in your hand right now.”

Josh smiled, as his fingers played with the tiny silver locket that hung around his chest. He had taken it off only to shower, once, afraid it would tarnish, but he felt so naked without it, that he had run into the room to grab it halfway through that shower. It was the last time that he had it off, it was always on his neck and he found himself clutching it throughout the day or night.

“Yeah… I guess so… it really is nice, isn’t it?”

“What is Josh?”

“To be so much in love… I really never understood all those romance novels before, but now I do… I can’t imagine life any other way, can you?”

“Hehe, you know something, you really are a romantic at heart Josh, but no, I can’t imagine life any other way now, it really is something unique and special.”

Josh smiled as Gordon sat back in his chair and stared back up at the little rose. It really wasn’t an expensive one, certainly not by some of the other price tags of the ornaments in the house, and yet Josh knew that Gordon would kill if anyone damaged that little rose. Well he

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couldn’t blame him; it was how he felt too about the pendent and chain.

He found his fingers twirling around the pendent, feeling the shiny metal against his hand, knowing that inside were two tiny cut out photo’s, something he hadn’t discovered until a few days after he had gotten the pendent. Man, that had been a day, the way he had been so stunned to find that Billy had somehow managed to get a picture of them both, and get it cut and shaped to fit into the tiny pendent.

They were sitting out by the pool, Billy resting before getting ready to go to work and Josh had been playing with the pendant. He could see how Billy smiled each time he caught him with the pendent in his hands and now he was grinning like a wolf.

“You keep playing with that and you’ll wear out the clasp,” he had said.

“Not on your life bub… besides, if it does wear out you’ll just have to get me a new clasp…”

“Sure, make me work long hours and buy you jewellery, just like a typical wife… hehe.”

“Bitch… and you love it anyway…”

“What, the working?”

“No silly, buying me stuff… you know one day we should get a couple of photo’s and stick them in here, after we get them cut down to size of course… hehe.”

“One day? Well I don’t know… the way your head is these days, I’d need to get an awfully bigger pendent… and they don’t come that large… hehe.”

“Fuck you… hmm, maybe we could get nudes… I could put that Brad Pitt picture in here, next to mine… hehe.”

“Oh, and he calls me a bitch… listen to her, hehe.”

“Yeah, well, it was an idea… hehe.”

“True, but you know, I don’t think there is room in there for any more pictures… hehe.”

“WHAT? Hey you…”

Josh pulled the pendent up and opened it with his fingernail, and there inside were indeed two pictures. On one side was a cut out of him, and the other one had a picture cut out of Billy. He stared down into the dark sparkling eyes that were his lover’s and he looked up, to see Billy standing over him, that same sparkle full sized and twinkling like a million stars had just burst out into the sky.

He looked back down at the smiling face, then up to the real one and his heart trembled as he realized once more just how much Billy was his man, his mate, his lover. He began to cry as the strong arms came down and lifted him upwards, gently shutting the pendent in his hands. His face was tilted upwards and he saw the sparkling eyes coming closer to his face.

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Josh felt the kiss on his lips, the salt from his tears smeared with the saliva from his mouth and he felt the rough edge of Billy’s tongue flick outwards and take the teardrops away. He opened his mouth to let his lover’s tongue in and he felt the warmth once more flare back into life, back to being a raging inferno deep within his soul.

He felt a small pang at his heart as he gripped the pendant tightly. It meant so much to him, it was his rose, and he looked up to see a knowing smile in Gordon’s eyes. He answered back with his own smile, turning his face into a thing of beauty, least, which was what Gordon, said, and echoed loudly by Billy. He felt strangely nervous as he thought back to when he discovered the pictures.

Josh had never known such love before, and it amazed him how each passing day brought him new awareness of just how much Billy meant to him. He would wake up at night, to just prop himself up on one elbow and stare over at the sleeping Billy next to him. Strange, but he had never felt comfortable with someone else in the bed with him, yet when he tried to sleep without Billy, he never could.

The few times that Billy would get up to fix breakfast, like on Saturdays, he would awaken before Billy could even get to the bathroom. Billy would always tell him to go back to sleep and he would smile and agree yet he never could. He would lay there, waiting till Billy had finished showering and gone down to start his cooking.

He would then rise and shower himself, feeling the wet towel that Billy had just used, or smelling the fresh scent of his soap. It always made him very horny and yet not in a sexual way really. It was like he was merely pinching himself, letting him know that what he had wasn’t some dream, that it was real.

Josh couldn’t explain it, he had tried a few times, but the words just never came out. He loved Billy so much that he felt like he was missing something of his own body when Billy wasn’t there. He hated it when he went out the door, even if it was to just go and grab some groceries.

Funny, but in the last few months, they really were never alone much. Generally if they needed something, the other would always go along. He had asked Billy why he came with him once, and was stunned to find that Billy simply didn’t want to be out of his sight. That had gotten a big wet kiss from him, and it had also made him feel all tingly and warm inside. He had felt the same way, but had felt that maybe he was smothering Billy.

To find out that Billy felt the same way had made him feel like there was no stopping them. Their future was ahead of them and they dreamed of it and he knew that only death would ever separate them. He shivered as that thought floated by his mind and the hall clock struck the midnight hour.

Josh felt a slight chill as the last of the chimes echoed and he

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started to settle himself. These last few minutes were always the hardest for him, as he waited for Billy to get home. He would start to sweat a little, as the minutes would drag by, and inside his heart would start to go just a bit faster as the time grew closer.

Josh leaned back in the chair, his eyes fixed to the very slow moving minute hand of the clock as his hands clutched the shiny pendent on his chest. He could feel Billy next to him, his heart could feel his touch, and his nose could smell that very special scent of sweat and Billy that aroused him totally. His body was bracing itself for his arrival, as it always did.

It was kind of funny actually, the way he would feel his cock stirring in his pants, right at around 10 after the hour, he could feel his pants feel tight, knowing that his dick was itching to welcome home its partner, its mate, its love. His buttocks would feel clammy too, as it too seemed anxious to feel Billy’s touch. He never could get used to that, the way he would itch and squirm those last few minutes before the front door opened.

It wasn’t that he was a sex maniac; it was just that he didn’t feel whole unless he could touch and caress that warm body of Billy’s. There was no other feeling like the soft touch of Billy’s hands across his chest. The way he would move the pendent from over his heart then bend down and kiss his chest. God, that feeling was so awesome; it always made him struggle to retain control. He knew if he didn’t , that the kiss would make him blow his load then and there, which really wasn’t a bad idea but there was always so much more to do before he could let himself loose like that.

Sex with Billy was always special, always different, no matter how tired he was, and when he got home he was hornier than Josh. He never thought that was possible, yet night after night Billy would prove him wrong. God, it felt so good to be loved like this, and he had a whole lifetime of this to look forward to.

The sudden thought brought his head up to stare at the clock and he saw the minute hand creeping just past the 3, and he looked towards the doorway, waiting for the tell tale sound of a key in the lock, and the creak of the knob as it would open to reveal to his aching heart his other half.

The seconds ticked on by, louder with each click, echoing harshly in his head as they moved onwards. His heart started to race ahead, eager for its nightly release. The love inside of him was growing stronger now, as the seconds continued their slow march forward. He could feel the palms of his hands getting sweaty as one hand clutched the arm of the chair and the other held tightly to the pendent.

The clock ticked forward and as the hand reached the 12 and the long hand of the clock jerked forward to rest on the 6, the chimes

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started, signalling the half hour. Josh felt his heart constrict, a deep chill seemed to suddenly materialize and he felt cold. It was as if an icy hand had reached inside and squeezed his heart.

Josh stared at the door, waiting for the scratching noise of a key being inserted into the lock, when the house shook to the soft clamour of the door chimes. His hand jerked and he felt a tug on his neck, then he looked down into his hand. Therelay the pendent, the chain dangling downwards.

The sudden noise of the door chimes had made his hand pull down, and the chain had broken in his force. The pendent lay there, staring up at him and suddenly he felt scared. Something was wrong and he could feel tears coming to his eyes. His heart seemed to stop beating for a second as the chimes continued to sound in the room.

Gordon looked at Josh; saw the chain dangling from out of his closed fist. A cold hand gripped his heart as he dropped the book in his hand. His eyes traveled first to Josh’s face, then as if being drawn by a magnet it focused on the glass encased rose. He blinked as he saw the light glitter on the small teardrop, hanging from the pedal. His whole body shivered, as he stared at the rose. Fear gripped him and he could see it raging inside of Josh’s face.

Silently he rose up out of the chair. He reached out to help Josh stand up and he could see the panic etched across the young face. He smiled, trying to calm the boy’s nerves, failing as his own fears grow inside of him. His eyes looked down at the broken chain, clutched tightly in Josh’s hand, his knuckles white from the pressure and his own eyes took a backwards glance at the rose above the mantle.

The light seemed dim, the blue light barely visible, as if a cloud had passed over it. He shivered and could feel his heart trembling with pure fear. His hand shook as it rested on Josh’s shoulder and he turned back to stare at the young blond next to him. There were tears in his eyes, and darkness that he had never seen before.

Together they walked out into the hallway to find Manuel by the front door, his aged body sagging by the massive doorframe. Gordon could feel the cold penetrate his spine, making every step pure agony as he walked towards the door and the unknown visitors.

Manuel turned to look at the approaching bodies and his face showed his own fear. Gordon could see the lines of age clearly etched on the servants face, but they were different this time. He glanced upwards, to stare over his servant towards the doorway, to see two tall young men.

He narrowed his eyes, feeling Josh’s hand grip his own, feeling him pressing the pendant deep into his skin as he recognized the figures as being two Police Officers. They stood there,in their dark blue uniforms, badges glittering in the hallway lights.

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Gordon took it all in, the uniforms, the dark face of one, and the pale face of the other. Neither of the two officers able to look at him or Josh as they approached the doorway. Neither of them able to keep their eyes on any one place as he and Josh stopped besides the shaking figure of Manuel.

Somehow Gordon managed to summon up enough courage to speak.

“Yes Officers… is there something wrong?”

Gordon hated the sound of his voice, hated having to ask and yet he knew he must. His heart felt like ice, and he could feel Josh’s hand clasping his tight, feel the icy cold of the once hot hand.

“Uh, yes sir, I am afraid so… I am sorry but there isn’t any easy way to say this…”

That was all he heard as he felt his whole left side stagger with a sudden pressure of immense pain. His mouth flew open as he staggered against the opened door. Two strong arms reached out for him and he felt a tugging on his left arm as he fought to regain his balance.

The pressure on his hand was gone, it was numb and ached as he leaned against the solid wooden door, the hands helping to keep him from falling to the tiled floor. He stared blankly ahead, seeing the stars outside, but they weren’t clear to him. They didn’t shine out in the clear blue of the night, they seemed tarnished, dull and lifeless.

His heart ached and he could feel a strange tightness around his chest. He was having trouble catching his breath and yet he couldn’t move. His legs felt like lead, his arms dangled at his side and he felt dizzy.

Gordon could feel himself being carried, his legs shuffling along the floor as two very strong arms seemed to be guiding him to the chair. Manual was leaning still against the doorframe, his eyes blank.

He glanced down and saw the floor but nothing else, he turned to stare outside and saw nothing, no moon, no stars, just black emptiness. Tears were flowing down his cheeks now and his heart quaked from a pain that was tearing him apart. He had never felt such pain, such anguish as he did right now and he couldn’t speak. His mouth moved but he couldn’t hear any words, nothing came from his lips.

The room seemed to be dark, there was a yellow tint to it but he couldn’t make anyone out. He knew there were people there, he could hear the soft rumble of voices inside his head and yet he couldn’t see anyone. Where was Billy, he needed Billy to help him, but he couldn’t find him. He reached out with his hand, hearing the sound of metal striking the floor.

It was his pendent, it had fallen from his grasp and he bent forward to search for it. Josh was on his knees, tears were flowing from his face, and he cried, “THE PENDENT, WHERE IS THE PENDENT?” but

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no one answered him right away.

He was feeling all around the floor, struggling to find the pendent but he couldn’t move, his arms were being held and he felt himself being lifted up, being restrained. Damn it, he couldn’t let them do this, he had to find the pendent, Billy would be upset if he knew he had lost it, he couldn’t do that, he had to find the pendent.

“PLEASE, I HAVE TO FIND IT, CAN”T YOU SEE… BILLY WILL BE MAD, I NEED TO FIND IT. GOD SOMEONE HELP ME FIND IT… OH GOD PLEASE,” he cried out, the sound of his young voice ripping apart the quiet of the night air. It shook the house, and his sobs filled the emptiness of the night.

“OH GOD, PLEASE HELP ME,” he shouted out, his body pressed against the wall, his legs unmoving, his body shaking uncontrollably as he searched for the pendent.

Suddenly he felt his hand being opened by someone’s strong grip and a soft metal disc being place in the palm of it. He knew it was his pendent and he cried, his tears flowing uncontrollably down his cheeks, dropping heedlessly to the floor.

Gordon had heard the cries and added his own as the light gradually grew clearer to him. His heart was aching beyond measure, his whole body still shook but the urgent plea of Josh’s voice woke him to action. He shrugged off the two strong arms that held him, surprising everyone with their power and he strode quickly to the fallen figure of Josh.

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He saw the pendant on the floor by his feet and quickly he picked it up, then pried open the young hand, to gently place it inside. He saw the recognition dawn on Josh’s anguish riddled face, and he saw the tears of pain flowing unheeded down his cheeks. He grabbed the boy out of the policeman’s arms and brought him into his own pain-ravaged body. Together they cried, their tears mingling together to form a river of despair and loneliness that only time and God could ever heal.

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